Despite admitting he “lost friends” over how he acted when in possession of his first Kookaburra Bubble cricket bat, one spring punter says his crisp, new Derby Day Best Bets magazine “won’t be leaving his sight”.

Sebastian Dweevle, 37, says he learnt a valuable life lesson after a former friend used the face of his Kookaburra to hammer a stump into the ground in the backyard.

Fortunately the 12 hours Dweevle spent ‘knocking in’ the bat with an old cricket ball in a stocking meant that the stump damage to his willow was minimal. 

“Protect the things you really love,” an emotional Dweevle said when reflecting on the “core memories” associated with his childhood bat. 

While the tribologist says he can be “a bit more carefree” with off-season editions of Best Bets, the Derby Day version is “sacrosanct” and will be given the treatment it deserves, which includes Dweevle putting a line through the Flemington scratchings on race morning using a ruler and red-ink only.

Dweevle said he’s happy for others to read from his copy, but he’ll be holding it at the time and will be the only person with page-turning privileges. 

“The last time I let my brother have a look at the quaddie legs, he left a crease in two pages and what I suspect was a tomato sauce fingerprint on another,” Dweevle told The Pakistan Star.

“I won’t be taking any chances this Saturday.”

More to follow.